Cheaper than Chips

We've spent the last couple of weeks in Asia, venturing through Thailand and Laos before coming to Hanoi this evening. The excitement has been non-stop, and with both of us several genuine watches richer, we're able to act like kings.. kind of.

Childish kings

We flew into Bangkok with slight trepidation, as so many people we'd spoken to who'd been, had said it was crap. Turns out that's a load of nonsense. Bangkok is amazing - you just have to accept it for what it is - a weird, over-populated, over-touristed, utterly bizarre at times place - but a fun one all the same. Also it has a funny smell when you get there, but you get used to it.

And it can get a bit wet.

Highlights of Bangkok included Thai boxing training, going to a 'table tennis club' (where Dave was lucky enough to play against one of the staff members) and Myles being propositioned by a lady of the night around 3am. After declining, jokingly saying he didn't know if the prostitute was male or female, she duly whipped her dress above her head, and pulled her underwear down (in the middle of a pretty public street) for the answer. Female in case you wanted to know.

Competition winner!

Also we bought heaps and heaps of 'goods' from the markets. We're unsure if this is a highlight or not.

Due to the horrific floods bombing through Thailand, we had to fly to the North of the country where we spent several days in Chiang Mai. It was far, far more serene than Bangkok, despite still being the second biggest city in the country. The local night market kept us entertained in evenings (when we weren't off watching a (free) ladyboy cabaret show - surprisingly good), as well as going to a Muay Thai fight night (a three-way blindfold match being the highlight); while days could be spent just walking around the town.

Great stuff

One day was put aside for elephant trekking. Seeing the elephants in their natural homes in Africa had been amazing, but riding them was on another level. Under the direction of our utterly hilarious/amazing/mushroomed-up guide Song, we rode through the jungle (dressed like hippies of course for some reason) on the back of these huge creatures to a waterfall - except when Dave's elephant decided she'd had enough and wanted to wander off in the wrong direction.

Cleaning the ride home

Following Thailand (though we'll be returning), our next destination was Luang Prabang in Laos, and instead of the horrifically sounding 30+ hour bus, we plumped for a two-day slow boat along the Mekong River. Unfortunately, you had to get a six hour minivan before you got on the boat, and we chanced upon a driver who looked like he fancied a nap in between the bits where he was overtaking on hills and blind corners. Luckily, the passenger seat was taken by soon-to-be best buddy Tracy, who decided to wake him up by having a chat with him; "DO YOU KNOW WAYNE ROONEY?" "WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE CURRY?" "HAVE YOU GOT A WIFE?" and so forth...

We have no idea who this is

Incredibly it did the trick, and we arrived at our place for the night safe and sound. In the morning we'd meet a load (again, soon-to-be mates) who did the same journey as us,  but for some reason did their journey through the night. Personally, we were of the opinion that they'd had the better journey as they wouldn't have been able to see what the driver was doing.

Doing some shots

The two day boat down the Mekong River was an enjoyable enough affair. At one point during the second day - for reasons we aren't sure - we dropped an old man off on a beach, with not a drop of civilisation in sight. We figure he was left there to die because he didn't pay for his ticket.

Bye mate :(

And so we've spent the last several days in Luang Prabang, spending our days at amazing waterfalls, and spending nights at all you can eat food markets (for less than £1) and an awesome bar named Utopia, where we've discovered a burning passion for volleyball. A slightly curious oddity is that bars have to shut down at 11:30pm, so if you want to stay out later you head to the BOWLING ALLEY! Except  when you get there, you discover it's.. just.. a bowling alley...

Waterfall party

We've just been on a short flight over to Hanoi, having a slightly bizarre experience with Lao Airlines - our backpacks got their own seats, the plane started moving the second they closed the door, and the safety presentation lasted (without exaggeration) five seconds.

Awesome breakdancing Lao kids

So Thailand and Laos have been a pretty fantastic few weeks for us. We managed to meet Alan from The Hangover (who hilariously didn't want Dave in the photo due to his hair - Alan was calling him Pepé Le Pew), a girl who claims (and we have our doubts) to have starred in a play about Stockport, and five of the most awesome Lao kids you could ever meet -  Gon, Jon, God, Samsung and Tom Hanks. Fingers crossed we'll survive crossing the streets of Vietnam, and we'll be updating soon..

The Hangover 3

A short stay in Africa

Slightly delayed, but it's finally time for the tale of our 11 days spent in Zambia and Botswana. First off, a few public thank yous though. Firstly to Myles' dad for offering us his airmiles to fly to Africa on the cheap, especially as South African Airways, who we flew with, are awesome. Next, to the Prestons who were fantastic hosts during our couple of odd nights we had to spend in Ascot (couldn't fly direct from Africa to Asia). To the Galloway family for picking us up at Heathrow Airport at 7AM. And finally to the Hurst Knoll Year 6 class. For those that don't know, they're taught by Myles' mum, and as part of their Geography lessons this year, they're following our worldwide adventures. Recently they were set a task to research Prague, advising us where to go, and what to see, and we were delighted to receive the letters!

So, back to the story. After a long and tiring flight, you could forgive us for having dodgy maths skills, which meant we calculated the currency conversion incorrectly by a factor of ten. Consequently we spent the first day/evening spending lots of money for no reason, assuming the 50,000 bills in our pockets was equal to $1, instead of $10. A horrible 'Hungry Lion' lunch and a (for Dave) severely undercooked chicken for dinner, meant Africa started slightly downhill, but that would soon change (apart from when we both got ill...).

Worst fast food chain ever

The following day we ventured into town to see the hand-craft market. Rows and rows of stalls where you'd be greeted by seller after seller, who'd be nigh on impossible to get rid of. They as good as lock you in their shop until you've bought the heaps of junk awesome merchandise on offer. After struggling through the market for a couple hours, we exited with severely heavier bags, particularly Dave, before spending the rest of the afternoon relaxing by the pool of our delightfully named hostel, Fawlty Towers.

Basil wasn't around sadly

Our next couple of days in Zambia were spent at Victoria Falls, which was quite simply incredible. Though we went in the dry season, it gave fantastic views, and going in the dry season had the added benefit of being able to swim in the Devil's Pool, the naturally formed swimming pool at the edge of the falls. Swimming and lying at the top of the falls, just a couple of metres away from being swept over to your death was incredible. Plus as part of the trip they gave you a scone. Superb stuff.

We're the two on the right in case you weren't sure

The only thing you can do to match that is a bungee jump. Which is precisely what we did the following day - a 111 metre jump above the Zambezi river, where it splits through the Zambia/Zimbabwe border. There's no point in even trying to describe the emotions of it so we'll leave it by saying: Everyone do one. As soon as you can.

Myles...

...and Dave.

The second half of our stay in Africa was less adrenaline fueled - though still fantastic. We got the chance to visit a couple of local villages (even meeting the head man of one village), and even tried our hands at farming during one afternoon. Turns out Zambians are far better at digging up onions than we are. Who'd have thought?

Dave and Chris farming

Just before our short stay in Crocodile Creek (amazing place), we popped to Botswana for a couple nights to go on safari in Chobe National Park. Incredibly, it was even better than Knowsley Safari Park. Hordes of buffalo, giraffes, monkeys and elephants (nearly 100,000 in the park) were mixed in with a few lions, hippos, crocs and other animals in a National Park over half the size of Wales. In the evening we camped somewhere out in the wilderness, stupidly not bringing anything you should take camping.

Chobe National Park

It's a huge shame we didn't get to see more of Africa, as the part we did see was incredible. We rowed down the Zambezi river, saw a cat get through security at an airport, and even learnt the Australian name for a ginger (ranga). Stay tuned for adventures from Asia soon. Oh and of course - on the flight from Livingstone to Johannesburg, Dave was sat next to a model - Genevieve Morton. Can't forget that.

Farewell Europe

First of all - to our hundreds thousands of followers, apologies for the lack of updates. The simple explanation was Oktoberfest. But we'll come to that...

We left the story last time with our brave warriors heading to Berlin to see famed Huddersfield University athlete Matt Bostock, now living in the German capital with his girlfriend Jess. They were great hosts over the weekend there, Berlin's (when you're not walking through the streets with people drinking beer/pissing everywhere) a cool city (oh and when there's not a huge anti-abortion protest), and Matt has a career as tour-guide waiting for him when he gives up with computing. Oh, plus we played hacky sack so it was automatically an amazing weekend. NB: Dave has now bought a hacky sack to take round the world, so look forward to hacky sack photo excitement in the near future...

Climbing over Berlin Wall

Following Berlin we were off to the party city of Prague... to get some chores done. But first, we met up with Andy Waugh and his mate Jack in the train station. Andy Waugh's a Loughborough University war veteron, and we were able to give him the lowdown of the dos and don'ts of Berlin (e.g., don't go to the club that plays a russian roulette variation on bugchasing.)

Anyway, back to the chores in Prague - both Myles and Dave needed haircuts at this point in our journey, plus Myles needed to have some dental work performed - so where other than Prague to do it? The city itself is fantastic. You head into the main square and there are food-stands everywhere serving steaks, pork, kebabs, grilled cheese... all for about a couple of quid. Following haircuts and dental treatment, the only thing left to do was head for a night out which we duly did at Roxy where it was DnB night. If you've ever been to a DnB night with a load of Czechs who've taken ecstasy, you'll know it's quite a bizarre experience. If you haven't, make sure you do it - the 'dancing' is quite something.

On the train to Prague

After many beautiful steaks, chickens and ribs, it was sadly time to leave Prague, though considering the next destination was Munich - and Oktoberfest, we weren't too upset. Oktoberfest was/is to quote repeatedly from Dave "*adjective* insane". It seems strange that a festival that is essentially a lot of people drinking, can be indescribable - but it is. From the moment when a couchsurfer tries to force a quad-whiskey down your neck at 10am (fair play to Dave, he finished his), to 3pm where you're barely conscious, and through to 9pm, when you're wondereing why you're so drunk, and why you're so hungry, and why, why, why you're paying €5 to go on the world's worst ghost train, it's just insane. It may simply be a beer festival, but it's something everyone needs to experience. NEEDS TO.

Probably about midday. Happy and dandy.

On the way home, we nearly had a slight hiccup. For those that know Dave, know he is rather lax with timekeeping. And those who know Germans, know that when your German couchsurfer says, "be back by 11pm as that's when I go to sleep, otherwise I'll kick you out", he means be back by 11:00pm on the dot. The inevitable happened, and when Myles went home shortly before 11pm to sleep, Dave went off to find some food before sprinting home, and making it back at 11:04pm. After a relentless begging session, he was allowed to stay though, and we were off to Oktoberfest the next day once more. Cue more of the same. Throw in some gingerbread, a Coronation Street loving Canadian, brass bands, dirndls, beer-after-beer-after-beer... and you just have the greatest party on earth.

Wahey!

After all the excitement from Oktoberfest, we decided to take in some peace, quiet and scenery in Slovenia. It's a 6-hour train ride through the Alps on the way to Slovenia, and just like Norway, you kind of felt like you were in the middle of Lord of the Rings. The same could be said of Slovenia, albeit with a slightly modern twist. We spent three days in the lovely-sounding city Bled. There's a beautiful lake in the centre of the city, and in the centre of the lake is a church on an island. So with nothing better to do we decided to swim to the island. Turns out the water in Slovenia is rather cold. We confirmed our theory the next day when we walked down Vintgar Gorge (awesome), and Myles decided to pop in for a little paddling session. Ignoring all the jokes though, Slovenia was a beautiful country, very cheap, and well worth seeing.

Slovenia

Our final few days were spent in Amsterdam. I'm sure many people reading this have been, so I hardly need to explain the ins and outs, but it's a very bizarre place. At times, fantastic, and at times, simply ridiculous. Our three highlights from the red-light district (don't worry...) were a) seeing twenty guys chase a guy down the street, into a bar, before laying into him with chairs, bottles and tables; b) finding out what the blue lights meant (if you haven't been to Amsterdam yet - this is where all the hotties are); and c) having an Asian lady of the night pop out of her door and sing Moves Like Jagger to us as we passed by. Beautiful. We decided to rent bikes while we were in the bike capital of the world too (NB: Dave had to get a ladies bike as he was too small for the mens bikes), and at that, Europe was over.

Cycling in Amsterdam

We've spent the last day in Ascot at family friends (big shoutout to the awesome Prestons), before we're off on a flight to Zambia (via South Africa) in a couple of hours time. Europe has been amazing - hopefully Africa will be better.